We all have those friends we hang out with, but don’t necessarily like. You know the ones that show signs of a toxic friendship?
The friend who always flakes on you, or the negative friend who talks about nothing but gossip, but ignores your stories. Even the one who always shows you a fun night out, but makes you feel badly about yourself.
Why do we choose to spend our free time with these types of people?
First, it takes recognizing the signs of a toxic friendship.
Now, being 29, I’ve realized two things about my social life. I would rather stay at home on a weekend about 90% of the time, and that I only hang out with a handful of people, not even very regularly. To me, quality is better than quantity.
Then I realized that I had the choice to say no. And that led to having much less tolerance for fickle and toxic friendships and way more expectations. There’s no need to waste your time with others that aren’t giving you theirs.
Signs of a Toxic Friendship
- Pull you into drama and gossip that only negatively impacts your life
- Makes you second-guess or question your decisions and actions
- Creates an atmosphere of lack of support, disrespect, and distrust in the friendship
- Can distract you from your life’s plans and cloud your path
- Makes you feel like you give more than you receive
- Heightens your anxiety and stress
- Always find yourself in bad situations around them
Positive Friendships Are With Friends Who
- Support your ambitions and dreams
- Hold you accountable
- Motivate you to live authentically
- Accept you as you are
- You can be vulnerable with
- Help you be a better you
- Are focused on their own growth and personal development
Conclusion: How to Cope When You See Signs of A Toxic Friendship
As selfish as it may seem to rid yourself of toxic friendships, it seems much worse to have unsupportive friends that don’t help you be the best person you can be.
Learn to distance yourself from the negativity by distancing yourself from the friendship. Take time to evaluate your life without the constant strain of keeping in contact.
Friendships are meant to enrich your life and help you make good, self-loving decisions, give mature, optimistic advice, and genuinely want you to succeed. And best of all, be your authentic and true self.
You can make some positive changes within your friends circle when you recognize the signs of a toxic friendship. Your time and effort are precious, and you have control over who you spend that time with. Having positive and mature people in your life is a way to find out what other happy, confident, fun-loving people are doing, so that together, you all can all become more happy and authentic in yourselves. If something’s telling you they don’t have your back, they probably don’t. When in doubt, trust your intuition.
Are you seeing signs of a toxic friendship in someone you know? Let me know in the comments!
Join over 400 women and gain instant access to The Melanated Maven Self Care Sessions, for weekly self care tips and tools, empowerment and positive mindset resources!